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So you’re probably wondering, what the hell is a situationship and do they really exist? Yes they do. In one way or another we might have found ourself in a situationship. That akward relationship that you just can’t define what exactly you guys are. You aren’t necessarily dating or in a relationship with the person. It is a situation whereby you guys are more than friends and less than a partner in a relationship. You know that situation whereby your friends ask you what the status is with that girl or guy and you become speechless saying it’s complicated. Well you’re in a situationship.

A situationship doesn’t have a defined status, at least you guys haven’t defined it yet. You know that point where you are saying we’re just taking it slow, seeing how things goes. While some may be comfortable with this, others might not. You may find it nerve wrecking and agonizing waiting for your partner to take it to the next level, seeking for improvement but instead you’re stuck, you’re not moving forward, it doesn’t seem like he’s asking you out anytime soon and most times situationship involves some sort of physical involvement, you guys could be having sex but you know it’s just not something that happened, a fling or friends with benefits. Seems like you’re stuck in a situationship.


NO DEFINITION: There’s no title whatsoever, you don’t know what you both are. You can’t introduce the person as your friend neither can you describe them as your boyfriend or girlfriend.

YOU’RE VERY SINGLE: You have no partner, since there’s no title you can’t label yourself as a boyfriend or girlfriend to the person. You still do most things single people do, do most things on your own.

CONFUSION: You are perplexed about the situation, you’re always wondering what you both are and what you’re not. What is it leading to, would anything come out of it? You don’t know what to do and what not to do.

ROMANTIC ATTACHMENT: There’s an attraction between you both, most times sexually. You guys get intimate from time to time but it’s not your random hook up or booty call.

EMOTIONAL DETACHMENT: There’s no emotional connection in any way. You may have feelings for him but it might not be anything serious as it might have stemmed from the romantic attachment.

LACK OF COMMUNICATION: You don’t talk often, probably don’t see often too. There’s no talk about what you guys are or what you could be. You rarely know tangible things about each other like their life goals and future plans.

NO CONSISTENCY: You both are unavailable to each other, no constant interaction except when it’s convenient for you. There might be some random texts here and there but nothing too revealing and there’s a lapse in the period of communication.


How to go about it is definitely up to you. Ask yourself, what do you want from this? Do you want to end it or do you want to move it in the direction of a relationship? Most times situationships can lead to relationships, you just have to define them first.So the first thing you might want to do is communicate, communicate your feelings.

Define the relationship. Have a one on one talk with the person and state what you want, the direction you want it to go. If you want a relationship talk about it, if it’s not working for you say so, if you want to end it do the same. What’s important is that you’re genuinely communicating what you want or what you don’t want.So now you’ve talked about it, act accordingly. If you’ve both decided to take things forward, great, go on dates, tell your friends about it, keep a steady relationship, be consistent don’t just ghost on the person and appear back, communicate. If you’ve decided to end it close that chapter and move on. Don’t hold on to the past.

Make a list of what you want and what you don’t want. Know what you want and don’t settle for something that isn’t it. Also communicate your feelings with the person before things get too serious.

So have you been in a situationship before and how did you go about it?

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  1. Very insightful!

    1. Thanks for reading 🤗

    1. Thanks for reading 🤗

  2. Reblogged this on T.C.Pascal and commented:
    Thank you for this!

    1. I’m glad you read it

  3. God. I’ve always known I was in a relationship but I’ve been too reluctant to accept it😪💔

    1. That’s the thing, we barely want to come to terms with it

  4. Ooh, I’ve been in a few of these over the years. Never thought to term it that way before!

    1. I’m glad you know about it now 😀

  5. That’s a good word Haan, situationship.. well written too!

  6. Lol I’ve been in thus,so not funny 😅😅. Though you did really good with this one

    1. Yeah, it’s not a funny situation. It just leaves you feeling confused and a whole lot of other things.

      1. I swear,like it’s not cool at all

  7. Insightful 💐

  8. Thanks for writing about this. Situationships feel awful because they target that tender spot of uncertainty within us. They don’t have to be bad, though. We can use them as indicators of what we want and don’t want!

    1. Yes, they feel awful and the uncertainty of the whole thing can be really frustrating. We can definitely use them as indicators of what we want and don’t want. Totally relate

  9. You did a great job outlining what a situationship looks like. I’m glad to highlighted the difference between romantic attachment and emotional attachment.

  10. Thank you for sharing this informative post. Now I learned about situationship. After reading this post, I realised that I’ve been in a situationship trice………

    1. Nice that you learnt about the term situationship from the post. Thanks for reading.

  11. Abundance of Flavor

    Haha I love the term, “situationship.” I feel like this happens all too often these days where you’re stuck in limbo and sure of exactly what’s going on. Great post!

    1. Yeah, there is a whole lot of uncertainty that comes with it. Thanks for reading 🤗

  12. Great post!

    While I haven’t personally been in a relationship like this, I can definitely see how this post can be helpful to the people who might be in a situation like this.

    Keep up the great work!

  13. “Situationship”. Briliant word choice! I’ve been in more than a few of these over the years, and yes, they do suck. I don’t know if other people have had other experiences, but very few of my “situationships” turned into actual relationships.
    In my experience, when a guy is serious and wants a relationship, they don’t beat around the bush and leave you wondering if they want a commitment. The ones who are at all reluctant to commit usually don’t change.
    We women become attracted to those guys based on perceived “chemistry”, which a lot of times is really just longing for them to want us and care about us the way we do about them. We long to be “the one” to change their hearts and make them want to settle down with us. But it’s a trap. Most of the time these guys are emotionally unavailable and can never be the partners we want them to be.
    I’m in a happy long-term relationship now, but if I ever found myself in a situationship again, I think I’d run for the hills! Just my two cents, though.

    1. First of all, I must say thanks for the comment. Yeah, situationships are the worsts. Very few of them turn into relationships, most of them never move out of that phase.
      Yes, it’s something I had to learn. If a guy is serious about you he’ll want a committed relationship and wouldn’t waste time but the ones that are not serious will just leave you confused with their actions.
      I’ve got to say that you must really be talking from experience and it’s something I can really relate to. That was the exact way I felt, longing for their love and attention and thought we had chemistry, lol🤦. When they are not interested, they are not, we can barely change their minds. Most of them just want a romantic attachment but are not emotionally available.
      I’m so happy that you’re in a relationship now and I wish you all the best. ♥️

  14. Situationship i feel is a new way of a relationship and you have tried to simplify it through your words so that people can understand their relationships status better.

    1. Yes I have. Thanks for reading. 😀

  15. This is really amazing. Been in couple of them… They really were not funny

    Nice work nianni.

    1. They aren’t funny at all especially when you think you guys are an item already only to be told you aren’t even friends.

      Thank you 😊

  16. […] All you need to know about situationships and how to avoid them […]

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